“This is going to be really hard, but I’m going to do it.” “This is going to take a really long time.” “I can’t afford that.” “I’m feeling okay I guess.” “I hate that kind of music.” or, “Here we go again, back to the same old grind.”
I have been practicing this spiritual exercise of watching what I say for years now, and still I have to stay on guard. Quite frequently I hear others basically creating their own doom, and I hear it so loudly and clearly because I have done the same thing in my own life.
But then one day, I started catching myself in the act.
Paying attention to what I was saying, I actually heard myself saying how difficult things were going to be, how badly I felt, what I was worried about, and how tough things were. These were pretty much my constant mantra, and things like this were all I ever said.
If you want to change your life, a good way to start is by listening to yourself. Catch yourself in the act, and then say something other than what you were going to say, even if it feels like a lie. You say “I feel great!”, and “This is going to be easy!”, and “My life is awesome!” even though you may not feel like it.
Another trick is to say, “I get to go pick up my daughter from school”, as opposed to, “I have to go pick up my daughter from school.”
Making these small adjustments may not seem like a lot, but I invite you to try it out! After all, isn’t it many small parts that make up “the big thing”?
My brain responded well to this exercise and so will yours. After all, what actually is so difficult? Something can only be difficult if we decide that it is difficult. What if we decide that it isn’t that big of a deal? Then it won’t be that big of a deal!
A good way to start working on learning to love yourself, is to respect yourself and understand that your words are important. Your words matter to others, but most importantly, they matter to you.