Should You Compare Yourself With Others?

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Kyle at Kanuga 2015

Kyle at Kanuga 2015

The answer to this question is, “Yes and no.”

We all do have things in common. We are all expressions of Spirit. But at the same time, we are all different.

We all come from different circumstances, different upbringing, and we are all in different states of consciousness at any given time.

It is dangerous for me to compare my insides with other people’s outsides. I generally do this with other people who I don’t really know. I see someone who looks like they have it all together, and I begin to wonder why I don’t.

Meanwhile, I know nothing about the person. They may be driving a new car, they may be dressed nicely, and they may seem happy, but I don’t know the story behind any of that.

When we start to say things like, “I wish I was more like him/her,” then in essence, we are putting ourselves down. Forgetting that no matter how a person appears before us, we all have challenges in our lives. Just because you don’t see challenges on the surface doesn’t mean that they aren’t there.

When we judge our insides by other people’s outsides, we are simply putting ourselves down. 

On the other hand, there are times when it has been very helpful for me to use other people to help change my perspective.

At times I get depressed and I can get caught up in self-pity.

During these times I find it helpful to look around me. There are people fighting all kinds of battles that are much worse than mine. Sure, I have problems, but I need to see that other people have problems too, and many people are dealing with things that are much more serious than what I am dealing with.

And this can help me to lift myself up out of depression or self-pity.

I have my health today and can ride my bike. A beautiful family and friends. I do what I love for a living, etc… You can always look around you and easily find people who have far greater challenges than what you are facing.

I use this when I need to, in order to remind myself that no matter how bad things may seem to me in this moment, they could always be worse. And this makes my plight seem much easier to accept.

This way of comparing is more about getting a “right” perspective.

It can also be about being inspired by others.

“If he can do it, then I can do it too!”

So I guess to sum it up, it is okay to compare yourself with others IF it is bringing you up. If it is being helpful.

It is not okay to compare yourself to others in order to bring yourself down or to put yourself down.

SPL cover (3)Kyle’s book, “Solving the Puzzle’s of Life” is available at AMAZON

Listen to and download Kyle’s talks and guided meditations for FREE right HERE

 

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