He’s trying to teach me that what I think of myself is what really matters. He’s trying to teach me that I really don’t control what other people think, say, or do. I am the one who has to be pleased with me.
In the beginning what I saw was nearly devastating.
The scene was like a Godzilla creature standing over a normal sized guy. Godzilla was stomping and kicking and berating the guy endlessly. The guy was down and obviously not even in the fight.
What was devastating was to realize that I was Godzilla, AND I was the poor guy too.
“You made poor life decisions!”, “You are not smart!” “You are lazy and don’t work hard enough!”, “You don’t care about other people!”, “Nothing ever goes your way and nothing ever will!”… it was an endless tirade.
It really hurt to discover that this was the way I felt about myself.
A person who feels this way about themselves is pretty easy to spot most of the time. Things aren’t going well for them. Not only that, but since they have absolutely no self-approval, they need approval from others, and they need it in the most desperate way.
And it is impossible for others to give it to them.
You have to feel good about yourself. You have to build your own self-esteem. You have to be the one who can look in the mirror and say, “I approve of myself!” and mean it.
The craziest thing in my case was that nobody else felt this way about me. Everyone else loved me and thought the world of me. It was me who stood over me and constantly shouted, “You should be better than you are!”
My spiritual advisor taught me that you need some paper and a pen.
Most of the things that Godzilla said were not true, and what was needed was FACTS. “Am I doing my best?” “Am I taking care of my responsibilities?” “What good things did I do today and what did I get accomplished?”
As soon as I started writing these things down and making a good assessment, it was obvious that Godzilla was a little nuts. It turned out that I was doing my best, trying my hardest. It turned out that most days I did a lot of good things.
The poor guy was nothing like Godzilla was making him out to be.
One day the poor guy suddenly out of nowhere, stood up, produced a rope from his pocket, and threw a lasso around Godzilla’s neck. He gave a mighty tug, which brought Godzilla to the ground where he could look directly into Godzilla’s eyes.
“I love you.” said the poor guy.
Kyle Shiver is a spiritual counselor, healer, and inspirational speaker. Make your appointment today by calling 912-495-8520 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org
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